buythesea answered your question: Serious Question:
sweats. mood swings. yes.
Luckily, no mood swings for me. But hot flashes, definitely.
I kind of went through it when I was on Lupron (horomone blocker) but idk if regular T will cause it. have fun with your hot flashes!
Did you go on Lupron before your first puberty? If not, I’m very curious about that. I didn’t know they did hormone blockers for people whose bodies produce estrogen after their estrogen-dominated puberties had set in…
Is menopause a thing I am going through right now?
I guess that’s one meaning for the phrase “growing up trans”?
I spoke about my transition in a way I hoped I never would.
I was hanging out with some new acquaintances complaining about how the professor I want to do super hard core queer gender theory with didn’t get that I was trans, and someone started a sentence, “can I ask, when did you…”
And, like, I knew where this was going. Duh. “…come out as trans?”
And I was feeling lazy. And I didn’t want to go through my whole saga, so I said, “well, I started thinking about it about half way through 10th grade, and then I came out right before 11th grade, and then I started testosterone a month ago.”
As though those were the bullet points that were most important to know. I immediately realized my mistake, and backpeddled with a pretty soggy “and, I mean, obviously my transition meant a lot of other things, but that’s probably what you were asking, right?”
And the thing is, when a cis person who knows nothing about trans people asks you about your transition, or your coming out process, or how you knew you were trans, or anything like that, they have no idea what they’re asking you. They will listen to pretty much anything you want to say to them, because you are a foreign world and they want to find a path through their culture shock.
And somehow I decided that the years I spent not doing testosterone were less important to this person’s understanding of me than the month I’ve spent doing testosterone.
This is a rant, but I’ve been having difficulties around talking about my testosterone use.
When I talk about T, I get defensive about T. Even people who should have known better received the news with the assumption that I had finally copped out to a binary identity and the ease of being something recognizable (in case anyone read that as insulting to binary identities: if a binary identity come naturally to you, it is not a cop out. However, for someone like me, who consistently struggles to be seen in a way that technically does not exist in the world, taking on a binary identity would be akin to stopping your doggy paddle in the middle of the ocean: everyone gets why you would do such a thing, but you have given into exhaustion and let yourself drown.). And it’s funny, because I am indeed hoping that T will make things easier for me, but not at all in that way; never in that way. I’m hoping it’ll make genderfuck less of a presentation I have to work for every morning as I get ready to face the world, and more of something that will just be consistently true of the way I look, regardless of how much effort I’ve put into my clothing or makeup.
And the thing is, I want to be able to talk about taking T. It’s exciting, it’s a big step for me, it’s a new phase and a new curiosity. But I don’t exactly know why I need to share with every person that this is happening for me. Honestly, when I decided to do it, I thought, what if I just keep it a secret? What if I just allow what happens to happen, and people will notice or not notice and then it’ll be about me and my body and my desires, rather than me and the whole world’s perceptions of what it means to undergo medical transition. But I can already feel myself slipping into thinking of T as a notch on my trans proof belt. It’s something people think they understand, and I’m worried about letting it signify me without elaboration, and sinking me a little further into that ocean.
Apparently trans women actually can apply to Smith -
Maybe this could work with other schools too! Apparently they don’t check your legal gender status, so you just mark your correct gender on your application and they take that at face value!
There’s more to say about the fact that this has apparently always been policy, but they have made no moves to make it common knowledge, but maybe we can spread awareness.
Click through for a better explanation.
I inject synthetic hormones into my body.