What To Do If You Are Flat Like A Ken Doll

I wanted to reblog this to add an edit

neutresex:
possible trigger warning: non-consensual sex, sexual violence, rape culture, rape

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How often do you use “fuck you” or hear someone else say “fuck you”? I’m guilty of it, I do it quite often. I’m always spewing out “fuck that!” or “fuck hate!” or “fuck (insert unpleasant concept/thing/person here)” But only lately have I begun to analyze my use of that language. “Fuck” represents the act or acts of having sex, intercourse, oral, WHATEVER. Sex. When we apply that to things like “fuck you,” and especially when we say “fuck you” because we don’t like something/someone, we are implying that through fucking someone we can ruin it/get rid of it. We are implying that we are going to do something that will be unpleasant, undesirable, and harmful to someone else in the hopes that it will make them upset or make them disappear. If my nose is working correctly, I think I smell a pot of rape culture brewing up. This is what rape culture is: perpetuating and implementing violence through sex. We are going to hurt people through sex, whether it being physically, mentally, or emotionally. And you can say, “hey it’s just a word” but it’s not. We must treat this like we’d treat any other racist, sexist, heterosexist, anti-trans, xenophobic, etc slur out there. By saying things like “fuck prop 8” or “fuck racism” we are using a tool that rape culture apologists use; we are negatively sexualizing unpleasant things with the mentality that we are combating inequality, hatred, and overall bad things. But we are simply using violence. We are implying that it is okay to apply violence through sex to get rid of something or someone. It is not okay. Saying “fuck you” is not okay.

blackenedbutterfly:
And this whole post…is phallocentric. It is saying ‘sex is only about putting (phallic) objects into other things.’ It is applying violence to sex. And to the word ‘fuck’.

Thank you, but no. This post is not good.

I don’t agree with everything Raven feels about this post, but she makes an excellent point that the language of this piece is somewhat policing. I still urge you to look past that to the point that Quentin (and also Mar) is making, that positioning fucking as something negative or violent isn’t good for any of us. Just like any other kind of harmful slur, people should consider being careful with the connotations they attach to the word fuck.

I find “douche” to be a really satisfying curse because douche really is a bad thing, so I don’t have to worry that I’m taking something positive or neutral or linked to anyone’s life and setting it up as a negative.

I’m all about being careful and considerate with language, but I do believe it is the choice of the speaker to decide what is and is not appropriate for their own use. I am still not sure how I will act on this particular opinion just yet, but my guess is that I’ll be working on making fucking a more empowering concept in my life, and I hope you’ll do the same.

(via bblackenedbutterfly)

Source: tranqualizer